Friday, October 21, 2011

How to Cuss like a First Grader

One of the perks of having a first grader is you always stay up to date on the lingo. The other day Dallin came out in a new basketball outfit and Porter told him he looked hot. Dallin proceeded to inform him, "Porter, you don't say hot for a boy. You say 'sick'. K, you look sick." Porter lapped up the lesson like the hungry little brother he is.

The other day I learned of a new naughty word on the market. Once again, courtesy of our first grader.
DB: "Mom, did you know peanut butter is a bad word?"
Me: "It is?"
DB: "Yea, it is. Okay cuz 'pee'- you know, like you gotta take a pee. Then 'nuts'. You know what those are, right Mom? You know, your privates. Ok, and 'butt'. Then, -er. See, it's a bad word." 

And all I could think about... "my son is talking to me openly about n-u-t-s? He still doesn't know that could be a little bit weird? This is good. I don't think I gave the secret away. Keep a straight face. Hopefully we can keep this open communication going a few more years...."

(PS I'm supposed to be at the gym right now. Instead I'm at the computer in defeat, I have a half-dressed 2 yr old recooping in front of a show after way too much crying and it's only 9:30 am, and a beautifully dressed pumpkin princess rolling around on the ground waiting patiently for her big brother to pull it together. Where's my Diet Coke?........)


  1. What a good mother you are. Not sure I could have kept a straight face during that conversation. Aren't first graders brilliant?! Pretty clever word separation.

  2. Awesome!! Now I'll feel like a rebel everytime I make my kids a PB&J.

  3. that's the cutest cuss word i've ever heard!

  4. That was hilarious. I will be sure to tell dallin he looks sick next time I see him...maybe he will think I am cool

  5. Owen and I had a conversation about nuts last night too. He asked why girls don't have nuts. Then he proceeded to tell me why boys are "awesomer" because they don't have to wipe after they pee. Definitely something about this age!


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