I think sometimes God feels like yelling that at us.
Like when we reach a fork in the road, and He's done His part in getting us that far, and then we're the one who has to take charge. But we don't want to take charge. We're scared to take charge. So we're standing at the fork, nervously pacing, waiting for that big red arrow to drop from the sky, pointing us in the only right direction. Because surely, there's only one right way. Which is why we need God to make the decision. We're humble, we know we're not capable.
But isn't it that sometimes there's no wrong decision? It's like when you're starving and looking in the fridge, and just can't decide what to eat. Either everything or nothing sounds good. And so you just keep standing. And starving. And staring. Your hunger can't be satisfied until you make a dang choice: do you want a PBJ with Doritos crushed in the middle or do you want cereal and milk? Come on. You're gonna stand there starving with great food options right in front of your face, but no one's gonna tell you which one is right for you. It's simply what do you want. You choose, and then I'll help you make it.
This thought hit me last week as I've been sitting at certain crossroads- some more important than others, some not important at all. But I wanted to be told...I didn't want to choose. I'm sure it's out of fear of making the wrong decision. And God had to be yelling down at that point, Now come on, work with me, will ya? WORK WITH ME. My hands are tied until you make your move. It's your turn. You go, and then, I promise...I PROMISE...I will still be here to help. So tell me, what do YOU....want?
One decision I was making last week was whether or not to run that dumb half-marathon. That dumb half marathon that I'd been training for for almost 3 months. And then 2 weeks before it I got sick. And in those 2 weeks I ran a whopping 4 miles. And the Wednesday before the run I finally went into the doctor and she put me on antibiotics, it was more than just the cold I thought I had. And all that week I was debating what to do, what I should do. So tell me, what do YOU....want? Wait, what? Sometimes it's just what I want? I think so. Sometimes I get to choose what I want, and then God is free to work His magic, to do His thing, and help me in achieving what I want. I was gonna need His help either way. Whether it was getting over the disappointment of not being able to run, or getting over the disappointment of a time that wasn't reflective of my preparation and ability. Whether it was needing His healing hand in getting rid of my illness or needing His healing hand as I was trudging- now unprepared- through those 13.1 miles. Do you kinda get what I'm saying? We choose what we want and then God knows how to help us, we free His hands when we pick which fork to follow.
This is our creative power, that we get to create whatever definition of AWESOME we want. We get to look those forks dead in the eye and decide what we want to make of it all. Does that sound so empowering to anyone besides me?!!!
Maybe sometimes we're looking for a bail out when we say we're humble, we know we're not capable. But God knows that we are capable. He appreciates our humility in including Him in our decisions. But expecting Him to do all the hard work and let us win with indecision-- huh uh. That's not how it works. That's not what this thing called life is all about it. God's not tempting us with pictures and stories and promises of Disneyland. No sir. He's throwing our booty on Space Mountain and is all, "HANDS UP.....WE'RE NO HAND-ING IT. Yea baby!" His love is strong enough that he's allowing us....to experience life. The highs, the lows, the thrills, and the heartaches. He loves us. He trusts us. He believes in us. So He's giving us it all. And sometimes that means we're going to be led all the way to the end of the path, and sometimes He's gonna call our bluff when we hit the fork.....
Poop or get off the crapper.
I don't know, those are just my thoughts. What are yours?