Thursday, March 29, 2012

The Fight to Wipe

Potty training should be on my mind heavier than it actually is. The Deetz turns 3 in a couple months so it is time for him to start earning his keep and give up the $30 a month diaper habit. But truth be told, because of past experience, I'm not in that big of a hurry. Now mind you, my experience in the potty training dept is only with boys and I realize that girls are probably a whole different subject. But other than the extra $30 a month, that's all I'm gaining from them hitting that milestone. The leash in fact becomes tighter, as every excursion from the house becomes a crap shot- we never know when and where "emergency" is gonna strike and how we're gonna shuffle a crew to an appropriate pooping spot in time. Potties are easy... side of the road and for the more desperate {and these days, the not-even-desperate-at-all} situations, we have the Hansen custom port-a-potty....a water bottle. But the pooping often puts us in a pickle.

And even when it doesn't put us in a pickle, it still requires me to be by their side within a reasonable amount of time {is 30 minutes reasonable?} Because I bring only one rule with me to potty-training.....don't even think about wiping your bum. Like don't even take too long of a glance at the TP. Not a chance. Hands off the roll. The thought of them spreading the brown stuff all over their bum, pulling their cute little GAP boxers up all proud and thinking they're good to go, all the while leaving me large amounts of surprises for later...nope, it causes me too much anxiety to reward this privilege right off the bat. That's an earned step.The kids do earn other privileges with potty training such as opening and closing the lid and flushing the toilet- appreciated responsibility for a 2 year old. But wiping yourself.....we'll revisit the subject in a year of so. It can get a bit touchy when they start feeling like they're responsible and independent and ready to try. And yet, I'm still yelling from upstairs, "Don't even think about it.... I'll be down in a minute." It becomes a fight...the fight to wipe.

My big boys have graduated and are self-wipers, which to me, is the real accomplishment. While this sheds the leash, it doesn't completely relieve the anxiety because you know they're doing a horrid job, and their doo-doo kissed undies are proof of it. Case in point: The other day, Porter came to me and was all, "Mom, my booty hurts." At which point I was all, "Well, drop your drawers {is that how you write that?} and let me take a look." Now you can imagine the sight that met my eyes when he did as instructed. Right there in plain view was the cause of his booty pains....a nice layer of doo doo schmear. "Well of course your booty hurts. It's filthy, now jump in the shower and scrub it clean." That cute little boy's face lit up in a big ole smile and he didn't argue before getting in the shower. Medical issue solved.

I was out with friends the other day when a table behind us erupted in applause and screaming. I turned around to see what the ruckus was, and one of the mama's sat proud and beaming as she shared the good news...."My son wipes his own butt." And that, my friends, is the real milestone in potty training that deserves celebration. I didn't rain on her parade with warnings of lots of "fun laundry". But then again, I'm sure she won't be that shocked....she does have a husband after all.


Do tell...are girls better wipers? Do you let your boys wipe? Are there secrets for teaching clean wiping that I don't know about? DIVULGE it all!

9 comments:

  1. I dont if girls are easier maybe it just depends on the kid. Dev was easy peasy and tayc.... Well it was a process with her. As far as bum wiping goes I agree with you!

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  2. From my experience, girls are better wipers, and potty trainers. Gabby didn't really potty train earlier than the boys, but when she did it was all at once, with no accidents. She even stopped night wetting at the same time.
    As for the boys, I think wiping is harder because they only do it occasionally. I think one of my older sons forgot he needed to wipe (ever) when he sat down because he didn't have to do it standing up. We've since reminded him often that he can't ignore that step - or he has to clean the undies.
    I'm anxious to hear the tips too - my boys could use them.

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  3. Have you ever gotten the flushable wet wipes? Do they help at all? I know we have gotten those a few times for Lucy--who isn't that great of a wiper :)

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  4. ha so funny, i def have to wipe sailor. no question. and i have to make sure she wipes when she number ones. she tries to take off without even wiping no matter what. i don't mind tho cuz then i can be sure of a good hand wash while I'm in there

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  5. I couldn't wait for Adler to wipe his own butt! I made a deal with him that at age 4 he was running the show. It was a lot of work--he would do it for everyone else, but when momma was around he all of a sudden couldn't wipe to save his life! So I never really had the problem with my kids wanting to wipe before I was ready. But I do have to say that the flushable wipes have been awesome--even my husband likes to use them!

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  6. I'm as scared as you are to take that wiping step with coop. I know he needs to learn especially with kindergarten coming up soon but I just can't stand to think of his nice clean undies getting those horrible skid marks! We do use and love the flushable wipes. I think they well help with the self wiping as well...when I get around to letting coop do that. :-)

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  7. I'm as scared as you are to take that wiping step with coop. I know he needs to learn especially with kindergarten coming up soon but I just can't stand to think of his nice clean undies getting those horrible skid marks! We do use and love the flushable wipes. I think they well help with the self wiping as well...when I get around to letting coop do that. :-)

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  8. See the wiping is the hard part. I do need to get flushable wipes- great idea. Amanda, can I tell u I love that u commented?!! Don't worry I won't tell Taneal, we would hate for her to get jealous! Haha! If u have another kid maybe u better not let them wipe and then they'll be dying to wipe! Always want what they can't have! Cas, K might be just the right place for coop to learn on his own, no need to rush it! Oh and PS how funny that a lot of kids are just fine with not wiping period- that is hilarious!

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  9. Gay you had me cracking up with this one! Oh the joys of parenthood!! Can't wait to wipe my little boy's booty :)

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