Sunday, April 3, 2011

Maturation and Immaturation....

It's all happening in this house. Even if immaturation isn't a real word. With that clarification, we'll start out on that note. When Yosh came home from his Denver trip a few weeks ago, he commented here and there about a couple of observations while staying at the Reese's. "Gay, you should see the Reese's house. Emily has done some pretty amazing things." I told him I have seen pictures on her blog and that she is style combined with talent  in a way that makes me green with envy. "Yea, I know there are pictures but seeing it is even more amazing."   Emily, do you want to come decorate our house?!! I think that's a style Yosh and I could easily settle on as we have differing tastes!  He also commented about some recipes that Emily makes. And let me clarify- he didn't even try these, he just heard the recipes. (Since when Yosh pays attention when the topic is recipes, I don't know. But it sure caught his attention.) He was all, "Maybe we should try those." My response- maybe a bit snippy..."Have you not noticed I don't cook anymore?" These days a "cooking" is Trader Joe's gnoccis with a bag of Caesar salad. 

I was thinking about these things over the next couple days when the realization hit me... I used to do these things also. I used to cook dinner 5 times a week and cooking had a very different definition- entree plus two sides. Seriously. Every meal consisted of that. And I probably baked about two times a week on top of that.
While my talent level is nothing even close to Emily's, I also did little projects around the house. Painting this, refinishing that, framing a picture or two, making books. I'm nothing close to the crafty type but I enjoyed having a project to do. 

So what in the world happened to me? The answer was crystal clear. A kid or two. It feels like a lifetime ago. I'm not sure I even know that girl anymore. I think she shows up about every 6 months to make a Sunday dinner and then shows up every time a child is born to half-decorate a nursery. Now, this is not at all depressing to me. In fact it is inspiring and motivating. I have a feeling she'll be coming back around when her youngest baby is about 3. But not with all the cooking- that's overrated.

I have immatured in that area of my life, but I think for the same reason- adding a kid or two to the family- that I have also matured in other areas. Thursday morning started out with the sun shining and the boys playing. At 7 am no less. And that was after they were already dressed and fed. An awesome start to the day. (I'm not being sarcastic either!)  A little before 8 we were leaving to take Dallin to the corner to go to school. But Porter didn't let Dallin ride his Razor to school which got Dallin all fired up. I often times mediate the boys' disagreements/conversations when necessary, but 95% of the time, I don't force any decision on them. And Porter's decision was he wasn't going to let Dallin borrow the Razor. We walked to the corner and Dallin continued to pout. And then just sat himself down in the middle of the side walk talking about, "I'm not going to school today." And sure enough I can see the little family he walks with approaching, leaving only about one minute to dismantle this bomb that in reality requires 30 minutes. And there is no miraculous ending to this story. The friends approach and are patiently waiting as Dallin goes back and forth about 5 times as to whether or not he's going to school. Finally he decides he is going but is slowly shuffling at a snail's pace which will inevitably make all of them late for school. The mounting pressure is killing me. I have the friend's mom and three experienced moms that we were making small talk with watching me. I don't know exactly what to do and when I do decide, I have absolutely no idea if I'm making the right decision. But I call Dallin to come back, who is now a block away, which ends in me half-dragging him back and we make our way back to the house. Don't worry- this isn't the area where I've matured. Still clueless in a lot of the mothering department. I tell him he can go to school whenever he is happy and ready to cooperate with others. And it probably did take about 30 minutes, but we made it there and it all turned out ok. But the big feat for me was the fact that that incident didn't set the mood for my day. So many times I let hiccups and bumps in the road affect me way too definitively, if that makes sense. And that is something I've been trying to work on. Especially with kids, there are going to be a lot of bad 10 minute spots through out my day. And sometimes even bad 30 minutes, or maybe even longer. But I can't let those times define the rest of the day. And way too many times I have let those bad 10 minutes trump the awesome 3 hours we just shared. As much as possible I need to find the strength to get over it and go on being happy and enjoying life with all the little critters ya know.

And Thursday I was able to do that. The following pics are all from that day. Proof that it was an awesome day. 
(And let's be honest, when it's sunny and 80 degrees and you're swimming in April, it makes the whole concept of moving on and choosing to be happy a whole lot easier!)

Even Dallin B put a smile on his face the rest of the day!


  1. You make me smile!!! It is funny how we all have similar experiences! And you know what... as a mom, you know your child and make the decision best for them... doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

    As for the cooking and projects, don't worry about it! Right now, you are dealing with all little kids. Time for those things will once again happen... it may be all to short as your little ones grow up too fast! So don't worry about it! (At least that is what I say to myself when it is not happening like I would like it to!... and I don't think it has anything to being immature.... rather it just means you are putting your family first... quite the opposite!

  2. So perfectly said. Every single word! Something I need to often remind myself of, not to let the little things effect my mood and my whole day. Thank you for that reminder!

    As for the cooking, Im impressed that you ever did it at all. You are a big step ahead of me. Trader joe's is a home cooked meal to me. :)

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  4. Thanks for the compliments... I often have to remind myself that my life is on it's own time line. I would put all my projects a side to have a sweet baby to hold instead...

    I love this post and how honest it was. You are so lovely. xxoo, Em

    We really enjoyed having Yosh stay with us.

  5. Well said! Enjoy those good moments!

  6. So, when I leave your house I am thinking, 'Someday I will decorate like Gay', so you can tell Yosh that.

    And didn't you just have a baby.

    And, your post below about losing Deeter is hilarious. Mark and I laughed pretty hard reading it.


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