Wednesday, April 3, 2013

What's the Color for Courage?

Hi everyone!
So I'm sitting down and a little perplexed about whatever's going on in this little mind of mine.
I absolutely can't come up with a blog post and I actually want to talk to you about it.
I've been struggling on the writing front and it's not because of lack of creativity and stimulation.
Al contrary.
I feel like my mind has been going, a million miles a minute to be exact, and that my thoughts have been filled with such passion.
But when I sit down to write, nothing comes.
I'm starting to wonder if maybe I do know the reason why.
I feel like there's some things I want to share, some deeper things.
Some things that I consider kind of private? maybe. I don't quite know if that is the word.
Oddly enough, more dire than the need to cover these things is the burning desire to share them.

And I don't know what the deal is but when I try to write about sitting in Apple's store for THREE FREAKING hours, it all of a sudden sounds so shallow.
Even though, while we're on the topic can we talk about how ridiculous that is.
And to think Homeboy #1 should have fixed my problem.
Now I can officially say I know how it feels to get tossed around like a rag doll.
Holy exhausting.
And after a while, I had to manually demand a lunch break.
Because sometimes Chipotle is the only thing that can give you the strength to go on.
Even if I did by-pass The Chipotle Chips.
Sea salt and a slight hint of lime on those bad boys???
To the girl in the second row.
She got the chips,
but I was in the front row.
And what did I win?
A new phone.
3 hours and one Chipotle trip later, I walked out with a new phone.
Just in time to be late to pick Porter up from Kindergarten.

And as deep and important as that story was,
it just isn't.
So back to what I'm really trying to say...
Give me some time while I'm trying to solidify what I want to say and how I want to say it.
Guess it's time to get naked and show who I am, why I am the way I am, and more stuff like that.
Quite possibly it will be completely boring to you and something only freeing to me.  
I've been trying to understand better what my definition of success is in regards to this blog. 
And a couple of months ago it hit me.
My definition of Success would be writing raw, honest, vulnerable material, not worrying about the reactions- positive or negative- of the readers.
I also want to care more about my readers.
Those two bullet points might sound contradicting, but I hope not.
I think my being more naked in my writing and not catering to reaction that I'm showing you I care about you and your naked insides that we all tend to cover.
So that's what I'm working towards, y'all.
So now I'm just praying for courage.
And these pants might possibly give me the courage I need.
Because cruising on a bike is one the most freeing acts out there.
Which is why these might me the awesomest pants in my closet at this point in time.


  1. Um- YES! Honest and raw and bared-all- that is good writing in my book. And holy cute! Those pants are freaking amazing!

  2. I'm always trying to be honest and raw, but when you're honest and raw, you risk putting yourself out there enough to be hurt - and that sucks. Love the pants, and I told get what you're trying to say.

  3. You go girl! Write it the way you feel it. Cute pantalones.


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